Nobel Clerihews

George Bernard Shaw

Thought dawdling a bore.

‘There’s nothing quite sadder;

Now fetch me my ladder.’

 

Eugene O’Neill

Made love to a seal

On the deck of a schooner.

The result was Oona.

 

José Saramago

Was placed under embargo

When he said a joined-up Iberia

Would make people cheerier.

 

Günter Grass

Had a musical arse,

Which, prompted by pain,

Would fart ‘Lili Marleen’.

 

Doris Lessing

Bathed in French dressing.

Fingers were crossed

When her salad was tossed.

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